Weekly Wrap™

One More War! One More War! "If you thought that two disastrous wars in the Middle East spread over 13 miserable years might cure Washington of its delusion that the next war will solve all our problems, you were wrong," wrote Paul Waldman in The Washington Post, in response to Lindsey Graham and John McCain's suggestion for bringing peace to the Middle East: Attack Syria. As the senators point out, we now know the key to success – "embedding U.S. military advisors" – a tactic that worked so well in Vietnam the Pentagon is celebrating its 50th anniversary. As for arming moderate Syrians, why not? They already supply ISIS with much of its U.S. and Saudi weaponry. Where’s Tiny? I’m not saying they get their tips from me, but after my post on Kim Jong-Un, reporters noticed the diminutive dictator had vanished from public view, which has led to wild speculation. My theory is that the “monolithic leader” is at a Fat Farm (지방 농장) in suburban Pyongyang, recovering from the “excessive eating and drinking” that accompanies his annual expenditures of $650 million on “luxury goods” (about half what he spends on missiles). He’s likely the only guest, as those places aren’t cheap and 84% of his people are already much too thin.

President Ebola. Finally, San Francisco-based radio host Michael Savage announced that the president sent U.S. troops to West Africa because he “wants to infect the nation with Ebola” as part of the administration’s war on white people.